Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Broncos Fans Now, and Forever

The Superbowl this past weekend was a bittersweet time in my life and not just because of the outcome of the game. Go Broncos. It was good because it’s one of the only times in my memory that the broncos had been doing well and the first Superbowl where I was interested. But the only thing that was missing from this last game were the shouts of happiness and the groans of frustration from my Dad, Bruce.

My dad is and has been the biggest Bronco fan that I know, as is apparent by the picture of me (1 month old) dressed in the most shiny and quickly grown out of one-sy with a big horse head and “Denver Broncos.” I know that I don’t really talk about my Dad as much as I should, but my interest and feelings are the most prevalent after the big game on Sunday. My Dad is the one who got me into football and interested in the game (playing and watching). He was also one of the only people I knew that would watch every NFL football game that he could, just for the sake of watching it. The thing that was most prevalent from watching Broncos and Utes football games was how vocal and involved he was in the games. He was constantly jumping up from the couch or hanging his head from the previous success/failure.

It just seems that as time goes, I find out all of the situations in which my Dad was always there or I need in that moment. Hunting and fishing were always our things together, and they’re not done one a consistent basis. Because I only engage in these activities once or twice a year, they’re not constantly on my mind for me to miss my Dad in. But I’m finding that the more that I do it, the more I feel isolated or lonely because he’s not there. It’s just because before now, he’s always been there whenever we…. Go out camping, have a Christmas at my grandma’s, reel in some big rainbow trout, look through the scope of my hunting rifle and size up the animal. He was there whenever I learned anything about the outdoors and as my jobs take me out into the back country, it’s strange to not have him within shouting range.

On the morning of the Superbowl I begin to feel this overwhelming sensation to drive up to Heber and visit my father’s grave. I just knew that if there were any chance in the world that I could see him on this momentous occasion for the Broncos and my father this would get me the closest. I could just imagine his house draped in orange and blue. I imagine streamers heading to and fro all along his ceiling. He would get that flag pole he always talked about getting just so that he could fly his Broncos flag high in the sky. Every Broncos shirt he owned would be tacked to the wall of the entry way. He would prepare a near king’s feast for the weary travelers in attendance. But he would also be the most serious throughout the entire game with interruption being punishable by death. It didn't hurt that I was covered in a new, Superbowl edition of a Peyton Manning jersey; a player my Dad respected and feared in equal proportions. That entire weekend, he wasn't far from my innermost thoughts. I dare say that I may have never seen as much as excitement in his face as I can imagine he would have at the news of the Broncos in the Super Bowl. As my cousin Sam texted me, "New theory... if Bruce can't watch it in person... they can't win!!" I think, in some cathartic way, that message has a strange resonance in my heart It would be difficult to really enjoy the Bronco's ultimate success without him screaming, cheering and bragging alongside me. 
I hope the decorations got him in the mood for the game

My High School Graduation: He was so proud.

Despite the devastating loss that my father’s team endured, I know that he would still be proud that the Broncos were in the Superbowl or that we knocked out the Patriots to get there. The optimism that you rarely say would be harping about how much ass the broncos were going to kick in the next season and all of the things they need to work on between now and them. I was just thinking of my dad this past week and thought I would run that by you guys. It was the first time, far too long for me to admit to, that I’d found my way to the Heber cemetery and paid a little respect to the man that shaped my perceptions and interests in nearly all aspects of my life. So the next time you guys see your dad, give them an extra hug, hand shake or head nod for me. Coming from a guy, who, at this point in his life would sacrifice all of his possessions to wrap my arms about my big, Bronco loving father. 

What I did in response to my grief. I decorated myself a little bit. 

I just hope that you seize every opportunity to appreciate the people in your life and let them know how much you mean to them. You never think about it until it’s too late. 

Thanks for clicking.

Bronco Fans Now, and Forever

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